two kids and a moose

Artyom: You still want to teach in Alaska?

Me: Yes.
Artyom: So you can teach two kids and a moose?

Me: Yep.

"Let me clarify the word 'postmodernism.' Evangelicals throw that word around a lot. Basically, it is used in the sense that 'If you don't agree with me, you're a postmodernist.'" - Prof. Vena (paraphrased)

Oh! Dass wat dat mean!

My Christmas present to Amber was Da Jesus Book. It's the New Testament translated in Hawaiian Pidgin. Really, it's absolutely fascinating.

Here are some goodies from Da Jesus Book:

"God wen get so plenny love an aloha fo da peopo inside da world, dat he wen send me, his one an ony Boy, so dat everybody dat trus me no get cut off from God, but get da real kine life dat stay to da max foeva." - John 3:16

"So den, God no goin punish da peopo dat stay tight wit Jesus Christ! Cuz get two tings dat stay fo real: First ting, if you stick wit God's Spirit, he goin make you come alive fo real kine an make you stay tight wit Jesus Christ, God's Spirit cut you loose from da bad kine stuff." Fo Da Rome Peopo 8:1-2

"No get love fo da bad kine stuff dat stay inside dis world. If anybody get love fo dis world, den dey no mo love fo da Fadda. You know, all da bad kine stuff dat stay inside dis world, da kine da peopo like get real bad ony fo make demself feel good, da kine stuff dey like look at an get ony fo demself, an da kine stuff dey get dat let um make big show, all dad no come from da Fadda, but from dis world. Dis world an all da stuff da peopo like get, dat goin all pau. But da guy dat do wat God like him fo do, he goin live fo real kine foeva." Numba 1 from John 2:15-17

---

Some reviews of the Da Jesus Book:

"I like dis Bible. I can undastan!" - high school student, Nanakuli

"Oh! Dass what dat mean!" - Leeward Coast churchgoer in Bible study